No More Stranger Danger

 I've alway been a social person, yet from a young age I was taught "don't talk to strangers" or "stranger danger". To an extent, especially when you are younger, this is true. Though there have been times when picking up a conversation with a stranger has resulted in nothing extraordinary, I have found that the good experiences have outweighed the bad ones (as long as you keep good judgement). I came from a smaller town where the friends I made in elementary school kind of just stuck with me throughout the end of my high school career. This was great, but it didn't really push me to speak with people who I didn't know very well. As I moved to school, classes were online and I lived in a college town where all of the students lived in one big neighborhood. This pushed me to get out of my house and meet people, also knowing that many were in a similar spot as me. Throughout the two years I lived there, many of the strongest bonds I made with friends were those that started from sparking up a conversation on the street, at a coffee shop, or at the beach. 

This is a photo from our thanksgiving dinner this past year, most of the friends at this table wouldn't be there if we never talked to strangers.

Though what I'm saying can go from an interaction as simple as a compliment or as deep as a full on conversation about life and careers, the importance still remains. Betterhelp.com even states that speaking with strangers can "enhance your confidence, allow you to gain and share knowledge, and start new friendships".  Additionally, in New York Times article by Jane Brody in 2020, she speaks about how "casual connections with people encountered in the course of daily life can give people a feeling that they belong to a community, which she described as “a basic human need". 

A recent example of an interaction that I had with a stranger was at a restaurant. I was sitting there with my family eating lunch and there was a little girl at the table next to us, one of the cutest I've ever seen. She kept looking over at us, eventually engaging in a game of peekaboo with me and my mom. Her grandma, who she was with, brought her over to our table and we ended up chatting for a while, I mentioned how I was moving down to San Diego and joked about wanting to be their babysitter. The grandma got so excited and admitted that she would be moving back to the east coast the same month I move down. She immediately texted her daughter and told her that we should get i
n contact. I now babysit that baby and have a great relationship with her and her mom! They also ended up only living 5 minutes from me, and her mom offered me an opportunity for an internship at her best friends marketing firm. 

There are stories like this, which can turn a simple interaction into something long term but there are also those simple hellos and comments that can turn someone's day around. I don't know about you but I've had many quick and friendly conversations with strangers that have boosted my mood for the day. These have occurred in any given place, at work, at the store, in class, or even on the street. What's really fun is giving a genuine compliment and being able to see that person's mood change in a positive way, even if you may never see them again, it still feels good to be able to add some positivity to someone's day. It even feels more meaningful sometimes because you have no prior relationship to that person, and therefore you have no ulterior motive for giving them any sort of compliment. 

This is a girl who I randomly approached in my anthropology class last year, 5 months later we went to Hawaii together on a whim and now she is one of my closest friends.

The chances are, if the person is in a chatty mood, you'll be able to find things in common about yourselves, and may be able to get inspiration from them in one way or another. I've learned in creative thinking classes that speaking to someone new or even going out of your routine in any way can make a big difference in your ability to think creatively, so this is one of the ways in which I try to implement
that. However you may do it, I encourage you to make that random comment or give a compliment to a stranger that you feel compelled to, the worst thing that could happen is usually just being ignored. Even being ignored can build character, being embarrassed is good for you too!